I have had a rise in kundalini in two periods of time. As a new Bahai (23 years), and later lasting almost 2 years. As a new Bahai and very fond of nature I learned about sexuality as something very close to earth, like I also found God in nature. I then learned to accept this force as something stronger than me I should not try to control how to move (or suppress). I felt my pride go (shame related to sexuality was rinsed out) when i tried to understand its will. It was hard to understand then because my intuition was not developed much yet.
The next time it happened several years later I understood the purity of sexual energy, worked through my fear of mens sexuality and found my own. I also found my authenticity. It made it impossible to go against my conviction. I understood a lot (with the assistance from God) obviously. I couldn't grasp thoughts normally in this state so God sendt visions to my questions.
Even though I was filled to the edge with sexual energy every day I never touched myself once. I focused on it every day, felt the energy as a meditation object to make it even stronger to challange myself. I also had a hope it would give me the energy I didn't allow myself from food, ha ha. That didn't happen. You can't exercise on sexual energy. Once every 6 weeks when I wasn't able to control myself anymore because the energy was so tense and overwhelming I let my control go to the energy. The sexual energy had a will on its own and I subjected to it as a way of working on my control issues. I understood the will in it was the same as Gods will. My intuition was much better at this point. The energy wanted to heal my body. So when I moved my body the way it wanted me to (a little similar to yoga asanas in a slow pace) I perceived it as making love with God, and when I moved my body in these positions the energy could fill up every fibre of my body. When I was filled I felt the energy go over to a higher plane and the tension was finally gone.
A new 6 weeks with meditation and no touching followed, increasing the tention once again till the unbearable. This practise of mine is something I made up myself. It doesn't belong to any religion, but is inspired by Buddhism and Bahai, making me find tantra myself.
The next time it happened several years later I understood the purity of sexual energy, worked through my fear of mens sexuality and found my own. I also found my authenticity. It made it impossible to go against my conviction. I understood a lot (with the assistance from God) obviously. I couldn't grasp thoughts normally in this state so God sendt visions to my questions.
Even though I was filled to the edge with sexual energy every day I never touched myself once. I focused on it every day, felt the energy as a meditation object to make it even stronger to challange myself. I also had a hope it would give me the energy I didn't allow myself from food, ha ha. That didn't happen. You can't exercise on sexual energy. Once every 6 weeks when I wasn't able to control myself anymore because the energy was so tense and overwhelming I let my control go to the energy. The sexual energy had a will on its own and I subjected to it as a way of working on my control issues. I understood the will in it was the same as Gods will. My intuition was much better at this point. The energy wanted to heal my body. So when I moved my body the way it wanted me to (a little similar to yoga asanas in a slow pace) I perceived it as making love with God, and when I moved my body in these positions the energy could fill up every fibre of my body. When I was filled I felt the energy go over to a higher plane and the tension was finally gone.
A new 6 weeks with meditation and no touching followed, increasing the tention once again till the unbearable. This practise of mine is something I made up myself. It doesn't belong to any religion, but is inspired by Buddhism and Bahai, making me find tantra myself.
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